In the interest of chronicling

I had said that I would be writing about the Call for a long time and really I have yet to write much since then about it so in the interest of chronicling everything I will attempt to bring everyone up to date on what has happened since then. In order to do so however I must first reveal a couple of things I did not reveal in any previous post.

1. The Sounds - The last thing we did at the call was release a new sound. I won't go into all of the details of the Word from the Lord we were responding to, but it had been prophesied that a new sound would rise up out of Nashville and be released over the nation. We reenacted Gideon's army shaking our keys to make the sound of breaking vessels and then 300 men with shofars of all shapes and sizes blew the trumpets as 70,000 people shouted to the king of Heaven. Something happened in that moment that is indescribable. There was a shift in the Spirit. Many hand drums were played and God's people lifted up shouts of triumph and celebration. Something MOVED in the Heavens. I literally felt a moving inside my chest. Not the rumble of the sound vibrations but a new page of history being turned. The Key of David was used by Christ and he opened a door no one can shut, he shut a door no one can open again. I was a witness to it. I saw it, heard it, felt it. On several separate occasions now I have heard this sound again. Yesterday July 29th I heard it resounding in our sanctuary and the Holy Spirit told me this was the sound of Heaven being released in our midst. I tell you this is ONLY the beginning! As the sound gets release in full measure we will see things we have NEVER seen.

2. The angel - In the midst of that moment when we released, "the sound" at the Call. I felt a small pinch on my arm. I turned to see who it was and if I needed to move to the side to let someone through or what they needed, but there was no one behind me. I asked the Lord what it was and He told me it was an angel. He told me to ask the angel why he was there so I asked, "why are you here?" and he said "I have been given to you" I asked for what purpose he had been given to me and he would only answer, "I have been given to you". I really didn't know what to do with this so I just went about my business for a few minutes until someone on stage began to talk about a new renaissance in the spirit. He said that angels from Heaven that had spent a million years worshiping before the throne of God have now been allowed to come to earth and equip the worshipers of this generation to release this new sound. I knew then why the angel had been given to me. Since then I have realized this wasn't the first time I had met this angel. He had been there several months ago in a Wednesday night service when he had told me, "I bring fire for Fort Wayne". God had told me he had fire for me in Nashville. Now I get it. The Bible says he makes his servants flames of fire it is speaking of angels and this one has apparently been given me as a fire for me and for Fort Wayne. The last few weeks in the house of Prayer we have seen some of what this is all about. I almost cannot do any known songs we spend the whole time in spontaneous singing and God visits in such powerful ways. (please understand that I realize that these times of visitation in worship have very little if anything to do with me. I only mention them because I believe they are the beginning of what God released at the Call.)

3. Sunday School - We have also seen some amazing things taking place in our Sunday school class. We have just begun a study in Song of Solomon. I never dreamed it would be this overwhelmingly good for ME! The class seams to be getting as wrecked as I am! Oh I hope so! Yesterday we were sharing some testimonies of what God has been doing and the Holy Spirit came in a real way and we just stopped right there and worshiped the Holy One together. There was a prophetic call given to anyone in the room that wanted to enter in to this place of releasing God's power and I believe He has released several more people into this lifestyle of running after ALL that God has. Of asking for the kisses of His mouth. I want to know the Love of Jesus in an experiential way beyond head knowledge and deep into the ocean of the true knowledge of God. That God has begun to stir in a way that will change our church and our city forever. It is beginning in THIS generation! RIGHT NOW!!!!!

Now that I have very briefly shared I want to invite ANYONE READING THIS to believe God and He will release something fresh and new in your heart. A new desire for Him. A new faith to believe that He is moving and changing EVERYTHING!!!!! FOR REAL!!!!! Ask Him now He will do it. This is not for some small special group of people this is for everyone who will hear and believe. In Jesus name and for His Glory.

Life in general

There is so much going on right now in my heart with God. He has been so good and remains so enigmatic that I am simultaneously fully satisfied and also deeply desirous of more. It is this tight rope walk that He puts us on. This tension between hunger and happiness, that keeps us running after Him. I would like to say that without this I would still run, but He knows my heart and he knows that isn't true. So He stays just out of reach but never so far away that I get completely frustrated.
I have so many questions and only one answer.
I have so many thirsts and only one fountain.
I have so many broken places and only one fix.
I have so many misconceptions and only one truth.
Jesus is all I was made for.

Living Free of Religion

There is a message just burning on my heart. Yesterday in our Sunday School class we talked about how the pleasures of God are far more powerful than the pleasures of sin. I really believe this! I know it is hard to believe sometimes but I think that is only because we have little or no real experience of the deep fountain of pleasure that is our God. The Bible speaks of thousands of pleasures at His right hand. Paul called Him the treasure before which all else was rubbish (dung). The mystics refer to Him as the one who is the true and sovereign joy, the one beyond all pleasure. We read it in Song of Solomon 1:2 that His love is more delightful than wine, and we don't believe any of it. We count the fleeting worthless happinesses of this world as more valuable than the eternal treasures Jesus encouraged us to hide in Heaven.
I believe this is the ONLY way to true Christianity. When the things of God are worth more to us than any other thing, and the knowledge of God, the personal, intimate, experiential, knowledge of God is our highest and best desire we WILL live free of sin. Period! We will have no taste for it. It will feel as worthless and indeed as destructive damaging and hideous as it truly is.
What a beautiful God He is to make His primary command to love Him. The deeper I go the more I realize that life is to be about this first commandment and not much else. When loving Jesus is our foundation, when we are truly rooted and grounded in love all else flows forth from there. The second commandment comes easy and fully, the other commandments sprout up like beautiful flowers in our garden of delights, and all this fruit is for Him.

Father teach me to first put my heart before your flame of love that I might BURN with the fire that burns in you, the love of God for God, for men, unbelievably for ME. Then will I know what it means to dwell in the righteousness peace and joy that is your kingdom.
To live life doing exactly what I want to do and all the time glorifying God and loving my neighbor, it is not just a dream - IT IS THE KINGDOM!!!!
Let it be
Amen

Guess the Author 3

Also dead Also not me -

"How sweet all at once it was for me, to be rid of those fruitless joys which I had once feared to lose. You drove them from me You who are the true and sovereign joy. You drove them from me and took their place, You who are sweeter than all pleasure."

Oh I can't get enough of the burning hearts of dead men who now have, in their "death", found that for which they so long desired!

One more and I will tell you who this one is written by: Brother Lawrence -
"I have had, at times, such delicious thoughts on the Lord that I am ashamed to mention them"

OH I love it!
Burnings!
Josh

guess the author 2

also dead - also not me

Oh! to behold the glory of Christ

Herein would I

Live

Herein would I

Die

Here on would I

Dwell

In my thoughts and my affections

Until

All things here below

become as dead and deformed things

And

no longer

in any way

call out for my affections.

Do I really want to know?

That was my question to myself yesterday. I started discussing with myself (as I often do) the deep inner issues of my confusing heart. These self discussions usually become a prayer but they don’t start that way. They usually start with some moment, almost always a Holy Spirit inspired moment, when I am confronted with the reality of the interior of Josh. 99.999999999999999% of the time I don’t like what I am confronted with. (I tend to be an arrogant jerk every once in a while that is the .0000000000000001% that’s left) That is probably why He confronts me! Then I go into introspective mode. “Why did I react that way?” or “Where did that come from?” slowly but surely, as I am guided by the Holy Spirit’s revelation of myself, I move deeper. Usually to arrive at some core issue deep in my heart that remains unresolved. One of the most common of them is a place where I don’t trust the Lord. It is amazing to me how much of my sin is motivated by a lack of faith. The other REALLY common place I end up is cost. It cost less in my value system (not God’s) for me to lie, cheat, steal, or whatever than it does to do the right thing. Ouch those hurt. Whatever the case I am called upon by God in that moment to repent (not just say I’m sorry but to TURN and go the other way) and ask for forgiveness. Many times God the Holy Spirit has to highlight that place in me many times before I see any victory there, but He is gracious always and He is the bringer of Freedom so I trust Him to know what I need when I need it.

Yesterday I was in the midst of one of these journeys into repentance when God touched a place that I recoiled at in fear. The question came, “do you involve yourself in leadership, worship, and teaching, even in writing your blog for you or for me?”

Uh…. Was all I had to say. “Not the right answer.” I heard.

“I hope it is for you but you are probably going to tell me it is for me.” I answered.

“More honest now thank you. I think you need to think about this a bit. Is any of this activity really for me? Or is it primarily about your ego, your self esteem, your desire to be adulated and followed?”

“Which is it Lord?” I asked timidly

“Do you really want to know?” was His only answer.

My answer was if it is Jesus then take it away. I think I meant that. It was one of those moments where I meant it with my head and forget my heart for the moment. Even if my heart doesn’t mean it right now I want my heart to mean it so hear the prayer regardless Lord. You know those moments? Yeah.

I really don’t know why I am writing this other than to say that if I have been wrongly motivated my whole life, and it is a distinct possibility, then forgive me my friends. I am only a broken man. This too may be an exercise of my vanity. Again if it is I am sorry.

I love you all.

joshy

The Cry for Kisses

I teach a Sr High Sunday school class. It is one of my greatest joys to see young people's minds opened to the Word of God on a weekly basis. Don't get me wrong. I know I have very little to do with it! The Holy Spirit is faithful and He is ever desirous of showing the beauty of Jesus to the hungry. That is why kids learn... but that isn't what today's post is about. We started a study today of the Song of Solomon. I have spent the last few weeks reawakening my journey into this book so I can be a tour guide for my class. The problem is that I am stuck! I am stuck on verse two of chapter one. Now that was plenty for this weeks class but if we are going to go further I need to get past that verse. It says, "Let Him kiss me with the kisses of His mouth for your love is better than wine." As I read that verse a few weeks ago the Holy Spirit ignited a flame in me that has done more to lead me closer to Jesus than well just about any scripture in my life thus far. I am not exaggerating by saying that. This verse has been my food and my breath for at least three weeks now. The Holy Spirit told me that it was THIS cry that started the Shulammite woman's journey that is chronicled in the rest of the song. That without this cry she never would have made it out of her vineyard of slave labor. She would have never been to the chambers of the King, she would have never been His bride at all. It was this dangerous, bold, inappropriate, cry, that started it all. She saw Him. She fell in love. She asked for His kisses, and the whole world changed. I began to think about my own life. I began to think about how little I have of God. I began to think about how small my understanding of His love really was. I began to think about how my life and my heart would be different if I really really knew that He was in love with me and that He desired me. How many lies could be undone in a moment by the truth of His love? How many sins would I have the power to say no to by living in that strength? What would it do to me to really and finally believe that He loves me?
Then I did it....
I asked.
"Let Him Kiss me with the kisses of His mouth." a timid whisper at the first I admit but then I asked again. "Would you kiss me? Would you make it undeniable? Would you finally give me, however you do it Jesus, the power to believe you are in love with me?" The more I thought about it the more desperate and urgent my plea to Heaven became. "Let Him Kiss ME!!!"
"OH COME and KISS ME!!!!"
And then it happened.
He said yes... Over the past few weeks by one way after another I have been experiencing the deepest revelation of the Love of Christ I ever have. My whole attitude has changed. He told me he found me beautiful and I believed Him. He told me I was His favorite and I believed Him. He told me He would enjoy me forever, and I believed Him. I actually deeply and satisfyingly believed Him! I am insane? Well maybe but I am also happier than I have ever been. I am in love. With Jesus. Who knew?
My friends I don't write this to brag. I don't write this to tell you that I have special knowledge or experience from God therefore send me $20 dollars and I will send you an anointed hankie that will fix your warts and financial problems. I am telling you this so you will PLEASE take up this cry!!! Pray it! ASK HIM! I DARE YOU! ASK HIM to KISS YOU!!
ask Him now.
ask HIM NOW!
you will never regret it!
I promise.

The Call

Ok I am probably going to be writing about what happened July 7th 2007 for a long time but I wanted to get SOMETHING out here today. I spent Saturday from about 8:15 am through about 10:30 pm praying and worshiping with, my guess, 80,000 people at LP field in Nashville TN.

I cannot describe to you the solemnity and holiness of many of those moments. I cannot.
I am standing in awe today of all that God did for His glory by His grace on that day. I am still shaken by it.

I received several massive downloads that I will need lots of time to unpack with the help of scripture and the Holy Spirit. I will be putting as much of that out here as possible for my own chronicling of it as much as anyone else being able to read it!

The one gigantic word over the whole day for me that I prayed over and over was from Song of Solomon 8:6.

Love Stronger than Death!
We prayed about freedom from sin - love stronger than death
we prayed for the end of abortion - love stronger than death
we prayed for the revival of the American church - love stronger than death
we prayed for reconciliation between races, churches etc - love stronger than death

Father I ask you to release your LOVE into our hearts. Love for Christ which overflows into love for each other! RELEASE LOVE STRONGER THAN DEATH!!!!!
Release love oh God! Bridal love that is stronger than death! The fiery seal upon the heart!
Jealousy stronger than the grave!
Amen.

Guess the Author - it wasn't me and he's dead

Late have I loved you,
O Beauty ever ancient, ever new,
late have I loved you!
You were within me, but I was outside,
and it was there that I searched for you.
In my unloveliness I plunged into the lovely things which you created.
You were with me, but I was not with you.
Created things kept me from you;
yet if they had not been in you they would have not been at all.
You called,
you shouted,
and you broke through my deafness.
You flashed, you shone, and you dispelled my blindness.
You breathed your fragrance on me;
I drew in breath and now I pant for you.
I have tasted you,
now I hunger and thirst for more.
You touched me, and I burned for your peace.

The Creative Capacity of Man

Had another mind blowing session of discussion with the Holy Spirit today and He unlocked my heart in new ways again. He truly is the author of liberty!!! Every time we meet I feel more free than I did before. Today it had to do with the creative capacity of the human race. I am only on the brink of this and I am honestly hoping that writing about it will help me to unpack the download a little.
I began musing on this because I watched a program about the future of automobiles. Weird I know but it did. The particular aspect they were exploring was the future of fuel and propulsion. They were discussing the many different possibilities beyond gasoline that may power the cars of the future. By the end I was ready to jump with both feet into this amazing field of study. I have no knowledge of engineering or chemistry I am just so energized by the potential of all of these ideas! I began to think how much potential lies in the creativity of the human race. There is next to no end to what we could accomplish if we are willing to pay the price to accomplish it. To spend the time and the resource to find the way. That immediately threw me into prayer. I know I know I am weird ok let it go! I began to ask God to release the creative capacity of man. To help us to understand all that we can do if we will stop waisting time and energy on so many worthless pursuits. I kind of felt bad asking Him to do this. I mean I am not praying for the salvation of the world or the spreading of the gospel, but we need this as well don't we. I started thinking about that then. Images of the tower of Babel growing in my mind. This is what men did before with the exercise of their fertile minds. They sought to "out grow" God. We are still trying to do that.
That is when the thought came to me, "but in the Millenial Kingdom our minds will be free from this desire to be without a need for God. We will realize that all is for His glory and from His glory and we will be FREE to be creative and effective without the cloud of sin and arrogance!!!! To be truly LIKE GOD but without the pretension that we don't need Him. The reality is that Satan did not offer us something that God did not want to give us in the first place. That God WANTED us to be like Him but Satan tried to sell us a way to do this without His help. That is why it was sin. NOT because we had the desire for knowledge. God WANTED and WANTS us to grow in knowledge and experience but he wants that for us in the appropriate way. God wants us to be creative! He wants us to create! He wants us to be like Him He just wants to take us there Himself and take sus there HIS WAY!
So I don't feel bad anymore asking God to release the creative capacity of man but Lord now I ask you to do it unto the praise of you Glory!! Let Christians be the most God like people on the planet NOT because we want to exalt ourselves but so we may exalt you! The source of all we are and all we have!
Where the Spirit of the Lord is there is Freedom!!!!